A few weeks ago I posted my perspective (as a wife) on this past year’s racing season. It was full of trial and error but like I said, there was a purpose for it and our plan is to grow from it. We take risks knowing that things might not go as planned, but there will always be hope.
Today I wanted to share with you a whole new perspective. A bold one you might say. It’s bold because it takes COURAGE to recognize your weaknesses and it takes even more COURAGE to share them. That’s exactly what the hubs did in his last post. In fact, it took him almost 2 weeks to write it. So much stored up. I remember him asking me to edit it and as I sat there reading it, I was in awe. In awe of his wisdom, strength, and COURAGE!
So without further adieu, I give you the PRO PERSPECTIVE (a.k.a the hubs)
After some reflecting after 70.3 Worlds the one word I could up with to describe the 2011 season with is….ROUGH!
My goals for 2011 were the following:
- Win two 70.3 events
- Not fall outside of top 10 in any race
- Top 10 at 70.3 Worlds
I went into this year with fantastic support from my support team of K-Swiss and First Endurance. I was also over the moon to have Quintana Roo bikes/wetsuits and Profile Design jump aboard to help with achieving all my goals for the year. I was ready and excited.
Ahhh, where to even begin! I’m not a huge fan of writing because I can never get anything down, my mind wonders at warp speed all the time. I’m distracted very easily (reason for horrible season). Just thinking of this past year really gets some raw emotions going and I’m not one who deals very well with emotions because being emotional is for girls right? Anyways, I hope get what I’m saying and realize how powerful confidence is.
From race number 1 (Galveston) of the year, I went in not really sure where I was with my fitness. The injury had gone but there are certain sets, intervals, that had not been met. The bike and run were the big question marks and I soon found out very quickly I was horrible! In fact, there was only one race this year when I really felt ok on the bike, but it still wasn’t very flash either. It was from the beatings that I received on the bike that began the sequence I like to call: stall, spin, crash, burn, die cycle. (I hold a private pilot license)
They say that training is 90% physical/10 % mental while racing is 90% mental/ 10% physical. I would agree 100% with this after my year. In 2010 I went into every race after my 2nd place finish at Eagleman thinking I was a contender. Others might not have agreed or have even seen me as thread, but dammit, I thought I was the man and was border line cocky! Confidence/cockiness is a beautiful thing. More powerful than any drug, supplement, or training session out there. If you believe it, there is no telling how far you can push outside of the limits you previously thought you were confined to.
True story here. Lake Stevens 70.3 2010. First race back since I won Steelhead and this race was stacked. Lieto, Gambles, Ambrose, Bell, Crawford, McKenzie, etc….I came off the bike in 7th after a slow transition and lost some ground to eventual winner Joe Gambles. After 3-4 miles I found myself battling for 3rd place with Ambrose and we closed in on second place. To honest, I though I was going to catch Gambles and win. Whether I would have or not have caught Joe, I was so focused on doing it and very little distracted me . Ambrose I were on a mission to win. Not content with 3rd or 4th but wanted to catch the racers in front of us until some nasty cramps set me back. Still manage a fourth place pushing through some horrible pain because I wanted it.
Point is, if you go into a race thinking and knowing you can do well, you probably will if you have done the work, but the confidence is absolutely essential. Of course winning is a difficult thing, because ultimately only one, just one person can win. We all are type A in preparation, but it is the guys who go in with no doubt, no doubt at all in their minds who are going to come out successful. Terenzo Bozzone is an athlete who I admire greatly. Terenzo is an athlete who I have been able to train with and he is got confidence radiating from him! You leave this guy thinking WOW! He know what he is capable of. Does he doubt himself…..no. Does his confidence reflect in his racing and results? Take a look at race results and you tell me.
Back to the rest of the season. I was just devastated with my results and how lousy the body was feeling going into every race. As each race went by my confidence was being ruined…..decimated! People would ask how you how you are feeling, and all I had was, “I will see once I get out there” REALLY????? Common James. I just wish I could go back into time and kick my own ass. It was the doubt that ruined me. I didn’t believe in myself, my training, and my training program. Believe me, this is not a good spot. I essentially went into a cave and lost shut myself off from everyone including my wife. I was a grumpy stubborn arsehole that would be defeated when athletes who I know I can ride with would fly by me! Not fun to admit it, because it made things very difficult for the people who care and want to see you succeed. Sorry Lindsay and others.
Ok, I’m done. Moral is…..confidence and belief is crucial in the sport. If you don’t have it, don’t expect to do anything too fantastic or hit goals that you’re wanting to hit. 2012 is a new year, a new attitude, and a new belief system. I really do think I have the tools for this sport and I look forward to exposing them to a much higher level in 2012.
“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude; nothing can help the man with wrong one.”
-Thomas Jefferson
Cheers,
JC
How do you define courage?
Double Cheers,
LC
James you are a very courageous person! thanks for sharing this
having courage in all aspects of life is so important, sometimes often over looked. we all have our moments of courage 🙂
Love how honest this post is! And it’s interesting to know that the pro’s can go through the same thing as us mere mortals 🙂 I think that acknowledging all this, though, so soon after the end of the season is pretty amazing and will only help you get in a better place for 2012 JC!!
yes, I am a mere motal. Gotta work on those strengths and sometimes that means starting from scratch. Thanks for the words shannon.
JC
“They say that training is 90% physical/10 % mental while racing is 90% mental/ 10% physical.”
Very interesting! I know that from piano playing: Practicing is mostly about concentration and dexterity, but having a recital affords *a lot* of mental strength!
so true Kath. And I know that piano recitals take that confidence too! To know your music that well and feel strong, ya know?
James – absolutely wicked post. Wow. We hear so much about you from LC, but reading the words from you was great to read.
Thanks Jayme. TOugh words to write, but needed to be said.
JC
It’s so great to hear his perspective- you know what, when i think about it, how many men really write out the truth of how they felt and how their perception of winning/losing affects who they are. That’s really admirable- and the courage he has to face that and know that he the resilience to persevere and keep going/ driving himself. We can all take a huge lesson away from this! Give him a huge hug for this- thank you for sharing!!! 🙂
I couldn’t agree more Kelsey! and yes, I will give him that hug!
xxoo
LC
Lindsay – your honey sounds, well, just awesome! What a blessing to go through life with such drive and determination! How long have you guys been married?
Wow, really those are such strong words! I think life is based on perspective and how we deal with things. My idea of bad or good is not the same as anyone else’s. I think we all deal with things differently and I think having a positive perspective does help. I have had times in life that I have let take me over mentally and it has definitely lead me down a bad path. I now realize that the negative does not have to rule my life. There is a chance to stop, regroup and start from scratch. I’m thinking about you two! I know you are heading down the right path!
This is so true sarena. It relates to every aspect of our lives and positive attitudes is what keep us moving forward. Without it, we’re just lost, stagnat, and run down. Right?
xxoo
Brilliant post James 🙂 And although I’ve no idea about the intricacies of triathlons, I know from riding competitions that it’s at least 90% confidence – I knew full well that me and Dave (my horse) could easily go round well at 1m10 – but if I went into a 0.95 nervous or thinking I was going to have jumps down, I’d over-ride and have them down – every time. And like you say, once you start doubting yourself, that’s it.
I love your attitude now; you can do it 🙂
yes, so true for every sport Eleanor. Self doubt can put us in tough spot if we’re not careful! thanks for commenting!
James
You know, my husband used to race motocross, he even had sponsors. When I met him I loved his drive and his love for the sport but I saw in him that lack of confidence that James was talking about. When it came down to it he didn’t have that cut throat drive to win. That was his biggest obstacle and one he never overcame. It’s not who he is. He was motivated don’t get me wrong, but you have to have a certain personality to be a consistent winner and as bad as he wanted it, it just wasn’t there. It was sad to see the end of his career and it’s still hard for him sometimes but we know he is right where the Lord wants him.
I know James has that drive and personality to win and nothing can stand in his way. Make 2012 a great year! I can’t wait to hear about the exciting changes in your lives with this new adventure. So cool!
Nicole
You know, I keep praying that God would clearly show us where to go with his career. I selfishly want him to succeed but I also know deep down in my heart that God can use James, maybe this his time to use Him. During the trials! THank you Nicole for every word of encouragement. Wish you were drinking coffee on a cool morning with me.
<3
WOW it is so amazing to hear the perspective on racing from an elite – I think it’s beyond incredible to come in 4th place in a competition because come on, WHO DOES THAT?!? But I understand (sort of, haha) that if your goal is to hit a certain (unbelievable) time or even win, even a top 10 finish can be disappointing. All of my best wishes for confidence, determination, and health for the 2012 season!
Thanks Diana. I appreciate all the wishes. Cheers!
JC (James)
Stunning post.
This applies so well to every aspect of life- you need to believe in yourself to achieve your goals and reach your full potential. Trust in yourself and others supporting you and you will excel.
Taking a step back and realising this takes such strength and can only help for next season. Good Luck! xxx
Thank you Claire, you are so right! Trust in yourself and support others and you will excel. A great reminder!
Love this! You are both very lucky to have each other. It’s obvious how much love there is between you, and your approach as a team will be the motivator for better times ahead.
I feel very lucky to have married such man. I hope our TEAM makes a come back next year. Thanks Jen!
p.s
I still can’t comment on your blog for some reason but loved the tale of two Runs. I am sure Anna was with you in spirit for those last 10 miles!
wow, it is so great that your husband feels comfortable enough to share this with us. it truly means so much! your partnership is so strong – nothing can stand in your way! i hope to be as strong a support as you are for each other!
I was honored to have him write this post on the blog today, and such realness. i love that man!
I read this when he posted it on his blog! Love that you shared it hear, too. I know I sure do love and support the Cotters! xoxo
*here…it’s been a long day. 😉
i knew what you meant my dear. Love you! get some rest!
<3
The seasons in which we fall short of our goals, as much as they hurt, are SO valuable! They cause us to rethink, retool and reflect. We can choose to roll over or we can choose to come back stronger. I have no doubt which you and J will do in 2012! Very inspiring!
Well said Marcia, and yes, the hubs and I both know you can relate.
😉
So interesting to read from the pro’s perspective! We learn so much from our “failures” (not to say this season was one at all!), and can only get stronger. I think you two have a lot of amazing things waiting for you 🙂 Smart cookies, hard workers, tough bodies, always looking ahead and always insightful! xo
Thanks Heather. You don’t even know how much we appreciate ALL you’ve done. Great things are coming, we just know it! Cheers to you and your marathon training!
Love how honest and blunt this is! Great to hear his tips on success. Thanks for writing, James!
I love it too Paige. It blunt but real! As a wife, its good to know whats going on inside that head so I can support. ya know?
Wow, it was really great to hear from James! And I totally agree with him that you have to believe in yourself to succeed. Good luck to him next year!
Thanks Linds. I know he appreciate all the support!
thanks so much for sharing this linds! james is right on with his points about confidence; i felt like i was almost reading a story of my own season. not believing in your training program and your fitness is not a good place to be and racing this way is no fun at all–not to mention, fruitless! i am so pleased that james and i both are on a new path now, making changes, and getting ready to remedy the situation and get the most from ourselves in 2012! i will be cheering for team cotter for sure!
I feel like you two have been in the same spot before just at different times! So good to hear your perspective Hill. And the Cotters are cheering you on from TX!!
p.s.
wish I could join you at mauna lani!!
wow, such great insight! thanks for sharing, that takes so much courage to open up so truthfully. you will do great next season with all of the lessons you learned this year!
Thanks Stephanie. I look forward to coming back stronger!
JC
WOW! I ADORE this and every word James had to say and all of the support in your words beaming through at the beginning. COURAGE. YES. Trial and error. YES. Moving forward and onward? YES! Cheers to you two 🙂
I agree Jo. We are moving forward, slowy but surely!
WOW… what a powerful post. Thank you for sharing this with us! James, you are an honest man. It sounds like good things are in store for the 2012 season!
thanks Sabrina. I appreciate the support.
Cheers,
JC
What a great story…although you might not have felt so when you were writing it. Loved the honesty and I’m going to go share that Thomas Jefferson quote right now!
Its a great motto for life. Cheers!
JC
I define courage as pushing through doubt and/or fear, no matter what the circumstance.
It’s fascinating to hear what goes through the mind of a top athlete in times of success and (relatively speaking!) failure. The part about wanting to go back and kick one’s own arse is something I particularly relate to! Self-doubt gets to me often, and prevents me from maximizing potential in many endurace-based training sessions. I do have those worries on race day, but for some reason it’s while training that they’re at their worst…possibly because injury sidelines me the day before the damn race so often.
Cockiness may be highly prized but so is humility – it takes a big man to admit when something has gone wrong, and the frustration at the challenges of this season can only serve to fuel the drive and determination to make the next one the most successful one yet 😀
Thanks so much for this inspiring post!
xxx
Jessica,
Injuries are tough on the mind, but don’t lose hope. Take care of yourself first and keep pushing towards good health, which will ultimately bring confidence! thanks for comment. I wish you the best for 2012.
JC
“I really do think I have the tools for this sport and I look forward to exposing them to a much higher level in 2012.”
thank you for sharing that elite athletes are human too!!
every age grouper goes through these thoughts as well.
BUT…just got to change one word in your last sentence….change the “think” to KNOW!!!
you have awesome support and a new awesome attitude…go get em!!
We are human, thats for sure. And I think its good for age groupers to be able to relate. Thanks for your boost of confidence Audrey. I KNOW I have the tools! Consider it changed.
😉
JC
J & L
What you say here is too true. Confidence is everything when it comes to racing. And reality is that you have to get it during your training too, or it won’t magically appear on race day. I hurt for the struggles you have had this past year, but know god has something amazing in store for you. It is obvious you have talent!!
I wish we could all have our own Alberto Salazar. From what I have read or heard on podcasts, he is just amazing. He gets people to believe they ARE capable of hitting certain goals, supports them in it, guides them through setbacks and cheers for them while they race. I think for the amateurs, blogland can sort of fit that need- at least it has for me!
Wishing you an amazing comeback!!
I meant God with a CAPITAL G. oops. 🙂
thanks Raina. Your words are so true! We all need a personal Alberto keeping us confdent. you are our Alberto!
this is so amazing. i love james’ honesty and courage to write this especially since it is hard for him to get his thoughts down on paper. i just know next season will be better!
me too Kalli! here’s to next season!
I was so happy to read this perspective. Thank you for sharing. And I think confidence and belief are crucial in all aspects of life period. And it takes courage to believe in yourself, it takes courage to continue in spite of the obstacles, and it takes courage to share it all with others.
thank you for always listening and always cheering for us. We both appreciate every word. Courage is the theme for next year!
I can see why that was tough to write. He had some tough challenges outside of his control thrown his way too – flats, cramps. That doesn’t make them any less of a blow to confidence. Confidence is so elusive, so fleeting, so fragile.
Courage is going into a race with no excuses prepared, fully exposed, with nothing and no one else to blame.
definitely agree there Cort! and it takes some time to process it all. Confidence is fragile, so better build it up strong. Right?
Love this. I bet anything that next year WILL be his year especially now that he’s written, shared and defined where his courage needs to come from. This was such an honest piece. Linds…I bet you’re even more in love after reading what he had to say. Blessings and many best wishes for the next season. CONFIDENCE. nice.
Triple cheers. 🙂
you know i do! This is the man I married and I am blessed.
xxoo
Love the “rawness” in this! Self doubt is so powerful. This helped me remind myself not to doubt so much before my marathon next weekend. Sounds like God is preparing him for a bunch of awesome races to me :)!!
Yes, no doubting yourself. You got this Angie! GOd is in control!
James I loved reading your perspective on this! It just made my heart hurt for you though — I can totally identify with having those doubting feelings about yourself. It is so much easier said than done to push those feelings aside and to think positively and confidently.
Hugs and prayers for you both.
Easier said than done but not impossible. Thanks Holly!
JC
it seems like 2011 was a big year for growing and learning – for the hubs and for a lot of us. i have full faith in the kiwi to have a comeback season in 2012 and be able to build his confidence back up. we have confidence in him, but he has to find it himself, and he will – because he is a superhuman. much love to you both for being so incredibly supportive to each other through these tough times.
and I have full faith in you that you will kick some major ARSE in 2012 too. You have OUR support 100%!!
Wow this is very powerful. Thank you so much for sharing this story. This really could not have come at a better time for me as I race my 3rd marathon tomorrow. I have suffered with self doubt going into the race but the bottom line is I have trained hard, I know what I am capable of and there are no excuses!
Thanks again for sharing. You have no idea how much I can relate.
i have full faith in you that your confidence will make you PR this next marathon! go for it!
Wow. I just read this with chills up and down my spine – you ask what courage is, how I define it? THIS is it. The courage to stand up and say that I failed by my own doing? THAT defines courage. Accepting responsibility and owning it fully takes courage. I tell you all the time Linds how much I admire you and your husband and your commitment to eachother, and reading these words from your husband pretty much cements that even further. You two are amazing. Full of strength and faith and love and courage. I know that 2012 is going to be an amazing year. For both of you.
well i am lucky to have him! And i know I say this all the time Jess but YOU are encouragement to us! I am blessed to have you in my life.
<3
You are one courageous friend!