Almost 7 years ago I married the Kiwi and became a Sherpa wife (aka pro athlete supporter, food maker and supplier, race day cheerleader, etc.). Almost 6 years ago I started creating Healthy Bites. Both are big dreams! In fact, if my husband was a pro triathlete, I probably wouldn’t have started Healthy Bites.
And if I hadn’t taken action to try to fix my diet (and heal), Healthy Bites wouldn’t have happened. You can read the full story here.
Anyway, here we are today, three years shy of a decade away from where it all began. We’ve had our SHINING years, we’ve had (many) hard years, and we’ve had our waiting years. But in the end, we still hang on. I like to think it’s because the tremendous support we’ve had. When people believe in YOU… YOU HANG ON!
Which leads me to today.
Sometimes DREAMING BIG means you’re gonna stall. You shift gears and something just doesn’t move right. Ever had that happen?
Big Plans and BIG Dreams usually come to a stall due to lack of patience (to quick to move), lack of trust, to much pressure, and sometimes you just don’t have the funds to properly get things going. Make sense?
We have stalled. In fact, it’s kinda where we are right now. Trying to figure out what gear to put those BIG DREAMS in. Move forward? Reverse? Stay put and wait for help?
Oh it can be tough to decide.
But one can be certain.. stalling doesn’t be stopping.
What to do when your dreams are stalled?
- Be patient. Wait to move until you are READY
- Find support. Ask for guidance from others.
- GIVE BACK. Yes, take the time to give back to other who have gotten you this far!
- Turn off the negativity and the pressure. That was a hard one for me. I truly wanted to know why we weren’t moving forward with both careers. I doubted myself but at the same time, I put way to much pressure on myself.
- REST. Another important one that’s hard to swallow. Maybe the reason you’re stalled in the first place is because you’ve run out of gas. Think about that. Find time to recharge, refuel, and embrace the mundane!
I’m going to keep posting recipes, ebooks, and giveaways for Healthy Bites until we figure out how to move forward. The kiwi has 2, maybe 3 races left of season. He’s ready! I know it. But I think in a few month’s, we’ll know what direction to go in. We’ll be UNSTALLED. A hopefully we can move forward. But that’s in God’s plans, and sometimes that means being ready to switch gears!
Whatever it may be, we’re along for the ride!
[Tweet “What to do NOW when you feel stalled @LCCotter #fitfluential #DREAMBIG”]
What are your DREAM BIG tips for when life feels stalled?Â
Cheers,
Corny Cotter
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p.s. i didn’t even edit this post, so please excuse the typos.. writing on a whim. 😉
Debbie @ Live from La Quinta
Having been there recently myself, I totally get it. You two will figure it all out and come back stronger than ever. Never, never, give up.
Jenn@Mark My Miles!
I feel similar many times, wondering if all my energy is directed in the “right” direction at this time of life. I hate not knowing the answer but learning to be patient in the waiting game.
Tiff
Sometimes not knowing is the hardest part. Things will unfold, and all will be revealed, even if it isn’t so easy to see at first. So glad y’all have each other! 🙂
LCCotter
thank you friend.
Jessie R Gipe
I really appreciate your honesty, Lindsay! I know it’s not always easy sharing this part of your life, but you did it. I’ll continue keeping you & Kiwi in my prayers. Things will eventually work out how there supposed too – just need to keep trust in God (which I know you do).
Heather @ FITaspire
I’m praying for you guys!!!
Meghan@CleanEatsFastFeets
It would be so much easier if life just came with a manual, but also so boring and predictable.
I think you are fabulous, and while I don’t know the kiwi, if I can ever do anything to help you two, you just let me know. I’m here for you.
LCCotter
i so agree. i don’t like predictable.. but i do like knowing that our efforts are being geared toward the right path, ya know? Thanks for all the support! xoxo
Abby @ BackAtSquareZero
I hope you two are able to figure it all out. I know you’ll find what is best for you.
Kaylin @ Enticing Healthy Eating
Oh Lindsay, it was like you reached inside my heart and soul and pulled out this article for encouragement to get me back on the right track of mind. Everything about it rings true, it’s just hard to remember to keep dreaming and believing when we are feeling stalled. As you know from our messages by email, I definitely feel stalled in my life (career-wise and future with my man) so it weighs heavily on me every day. Thank you for the encouraging words! I loved that quote you posted with this too–I’m keeping it up on my computer desktop to remember it often!
LCCotter
<3 you! keep dreaming big and pursing your passion friend
Elle
When my dream big plans are stalled, I like to sit back re-evaluate why and how I can change my current plateau. I like to write things down and focus on why the dream is important to me. That’s what re-motivates me.
Some people rather dream small so that they can easily reach their goals, but I believe in dreaming big and working hard to get to where I want to get to.
LCCotter
wow!! love this! thank you so much! <3
Kim
I know that no matter what direction y’all end up going you will achieve big things because that is the kind of people you are!!!
Megan (The Lyons' Share)
I truly can’t tell you how much I admire you. You are such an amazing woman, and I know you’re still on the road towards doing great things! Although my self-employment has been on a much smaller time frame, I understand the ups and downs, and know that if you trust the process, LISTEN to your intuition / higher power / true inner voice / whatever you want to call it, you’ll find the right answers for you two. <3
Jody - Fit at 56
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO get! I have to email but need more time – I will get to you soon – this weekend! HUGS!!!!!!!!!
Melissa @ Treats With a Twist
Oh lady. I know exactly how you feel. I feel so stuck. I don’t know what to do, or if there is anything TO do. I just have that feeling inside where I’m being pulled forward yet being held back at the same time. You know the feeling. I’m waiting. I’m trying to wait and see if things become more clear. Why aren’t things rolling for me like they seem to be rolling for others who are in my same position? Its not fair, but life isn’t fair.
LCCotter
don’t give up friend. You are sooooo so talented. I know it’s hard to realize in this pinterest obsessed food blog world. You have amazing skill, i’ll support you in any way! and feel free to vent to me anytime. hehe.
Sarah Pie
Great post for a Saturday morning where I was sitting here contemplating what to do next. I haven’t been shy about the fact that life has not headed in the direction I would have planned (or liked!) this year but as always your words remind me that sometimes you really do just have to let go and let god’s plan for you have a chance to come being.
Thanks friend 🙂
She Rocks Fitness
I think you have the perfect and realistic plan for moving forward. These are all things I try to do as well. Although resting is still the hardest one. I’m here for you 100% and when you’re ready for me to come to Austin, that’ll be the perfect weekend for REST and WINE!
Arman @ thebigmansworld
I think patience is a HUGE thing when it comes to having dreams and them taking longer/stalling/pausing whichever way we see it- so often we just bite the bullet and give in but it’s those moments which are the hardest- to push through.
Holding us both afloat and motivation high for our dreams to happen.
Dreams are the blueprints to success.
Cassie
This is so great, Lindsay. I have felt stalled for at least a year… and I think I’m on the cusp of change. It is just so, so scary!!
Brooke
I love you, and I’m praying for you both. Just wanted you to know that. Xoxo (meet-up soon?)
Sarena (The Non-Dairy Queen)
Oh friend, I miss you like you would not believe! My life is not stalled right now, but I feel like I’m in full gear in a different direction. Is it the right one? I don’t know. I’m giving it a chance to see what happens. I’m missing a HUGE part of my life at home and my friends. I’m hoping to find answers down the road myself. I love you and I’m always here for you! xoxo
Danielle @ Eat Primal, Run Hard
My biggest tip is an Albert Einstein quote: the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again trying to get a different result. When this happens – in my teaching, and now in my training and eating – I change things. It’s how I tried my first triathlon, it’s why I bought a road bike, and it’s why I’m going to be doing Primal Blueprint Expert Certification.
Change what you do or how you think about something, that’s what I say 🙂
LCCotter
you’re doing that certification?!! that’s freaking awesome! You will rock at it
Danielle @ Eat Primal, Run Hard
Sure am! Thanks 🙂
Jennifer FIsher
I try to remind myself to never let my fears be bigger that my dreams . . .
Beth @ Miles and Trials
Thank you for sharing your journey. It takes courage to openly show what you are going through, and many of us learn and benefit from this. It seems to me that inspiring and encouraging others are just a few of your God-given gifts and you do it so well!
Lucie@FitSwissChick
I totally get that – and it needs the effort to hold through!! Patience and rest, yes. Sometimes it’s hard – moving forard is easier. But I know you guys are a fabulous team and will make the best out of whatever will come.
The package arrived ALREADY!! WOW! Thank you SO SO MUCH!!
caren magill
I could have wrote this myself at least 3 times in the last 2 years. It’s part of the process. Every time you just have to keep asking yourself if this is still the path you want to be on. If it is, just do what you can to keep moving the bus forward. But if your heart ever tells you it’s time to change course, give the feeling some time to sit. If you continue to feel that way, it’s probably time to relook at things.
Life doesn’t put us on a clear path to anything and success is never linear. Follow your own heart and do what makes you happy.
thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know i”m not alone….
LCCotter
thank you Caren! Good to know you followed your heart! and nice to “meet” you!
Laura @ Mommy Run Fast
This post had me thinking of two things… one, that times of uncertainty refine us and two, that no successful journey is ever linear. It’s supposed to be forward and back, forward and back. Hoping that the steps forward for you become clear very soon!
Nicole @ Fitful Focus
I think these stall periods are a good time to reflect on the journey thus far. What has gone well, what hasn’t? It’s a good time to adjust goals, if need be, and figure out how you want to move forward! Wherever your journey takes you, I know it will be epic!
Danica @ It's Progression
Just prayed for you, friend. God will guide you – trust Him!
LCCotter
you are amazing! thank YOU
Megan @ Skinny Fitalicious
I think sometimes when we have dreams, we want everything right now THIS SECOND. At least that’s how I am anyway. It’s good to slow down and reflect on where things are & reset. Great tips lady!
LCCotter
oh girl! yes, i knew you would relate seeing as you just MOVED forward
Ashley @ My Food N Fitness Diaries
Love how you can take a time like this and make a motivating and inspirational post out of it! You have no idea the positive impact you make on people every single day. You’re amazing, Linds! You guys will be in my prayers as you decide which gear to go in … He will guide you! Trust in that. xo
Lisa @ RunWiki
You will get through this slump, I know it and I know you know it! You and your husband have so much courage. Things will become clear in time. You are so balanced and positive about this.. you are amazing!
My big dream right now is to be here for my children and husband. I am the CEO of my house, so I have put almost everything else on the back burner– aside from friends and extended family. I feel busy in the best possible way. Limiting (almost eliminating) my time on social media has made me a much more happy and joyful person. I am free to put my energy into the things that mean the most to me. Lately, dreaming big for me, has meant reevaluating what big dreams are. I used to think it was literally a big dream– now I wondering if my big dream isn’t right in front of me… something 5 years ago would not have considered a dream at all. Only time will tell.
Love you so so much my precious, beautiful friend! xoxo
LCCotter
i adore you! all your words ring true to me. And i love where your DREAMS are today.. right in front of you
molly
Embrace the mundane! When I don’t have much on my plate I tend to feel lazy. But then when things are go go go, I wish I had time for even a nap! I like your insight. Will be praying for you guys! In the meanwhile … Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, steadfast in prayer. 🙂
LCCotter
ohh my favorite verse. thank YOU
Erin @ Her Heartland Soul
You two are so cute together! I think it’s normal to feel stalled from time to time. I do right now. I hope you get unstalled soon!
Jen @ Chase the Red Grape
My tip is to BREATHE! Focus in what you have in life and that no matter what you always have each other. Together you can face any challenge you want to face and if you decide not to face it then that’s ok too. Sometimes saying no, stopping or resting is the hardest challenge of all!
LCCotter
i would agree. learning to rest is key though, yes?
Jen @Chase the Red Grape
Completely! Learning to stop and rest is one of the hardest things of all yet the most needed and rewarding!
Valerie Darling
I feel this way right now. My boyfriend keeps telling me to be patient and just go with the flow but I’m not a patient person! Good to hear that other people, even those who are truly successful, feel the same way sometimes.
LCCotter
you have a smart boyfriend! xxoo
jobo
Oh friend, you inspire me so. You motivate me. You warm my heart with your positivity, drive and dedication. I love love love this and am praying for you always, for the next step in your journey – both of you – and for peace within, wherever your journey takes you next. much love to you!
Sarah
Great post for me today. Thanks, friend.
LCCotter
Call or email anytime! i so need to catch up!
Chris
I never stall on my dreams because usually I never take that first step to chase them. I think many of your points are applicable to beginning as well though, so thank you for that. I’ll refer back when I finally take the plunge!
LCCotter
We will be supporting you when you do! plunge away!
Kelly @ Cupcake Kelly's
Honestly, therapy. My dreams are more things I can’t control, so for me learning to let go and let God has been hard, and terrifying, and full of frustration.
Marcia
This is such a tough question. Doing too much could be restless, impatient, and desperate, while waiting could be construed as passive and allowing decisions to be made for you.
I think I’d go with breathe, assess, listen to your inner voice, and trust.
xoxo 🙂
Giselle
I think if dreams were never stalled, obstacles were never overcome and everything was smooth sailing all the time we would never progress or get better in life. God puts those situations in front of us to make us stronger!
LCCotter
amen to that!!
Jessica @ Dairy Free Betty
Great post!! Love it!! What an adventure for you guys!!
Gina
This one is much needed today. Thank you!
LCCotter
virtual hugs!
Missy
Maybe dreams get “stalled” or put on hold…delays?
BUT life never ever stalls.
I am certain that during this “holding” period other areas of your life are becoming more fruitful, and opportunities are presenting themselves that may be part of the bigger picture. Perhaps maybe you are needing to think outside “the box”, which might ultimately enrich “the box” in the long run.
I’m in a holding pattern with my career change. Frustrating. BUT I am focusing on the “micro” movements in my life rather than the big “macro” movement.
Virtual encouragement to you!
LCCotter
oh i like that. micro movements. Thank you! and please keep me posted on you! virtual encouragement on this end as well friend.
Holly @ EatGreatBEGreat
I think having your dreams stalled from time to time is perfectly normal. And when that happens, I think it’s a good time to reflect, rest and renew. Your dreams won’t be stalled forever and in fact, that break may give you both time to discover new dreams to work towards. You two are smart people and I have no doubt, you’ll figure it all out.
Krysten Siba Bishop (@darwinianfail)
I know you two will choose to do what is best for you. And tackle it with GUSTO!! xoxox
Laura @losingrace
Fear of ‘standing still’ or stalling has always been something I struggle with. Mainly because patience was not something I was born with and still struggle with it greatly, 27 years later. I agree with everything you said, reaching for support from others but also finding ways to give back is a really good one. Lending a hand and focusing on others, is obviously a positive thing to do but also distracts you from what might be going on in your life. No better distraction in my mind. I also find that if one ‘dream’ or thing is ‘stalling’ find something smaller and attainable in the mean time. There are so many things I want to do in this world and just because one might be on hold doesn’t mean I can’t use that time to start chipping away at others 🙂
Thank you for always being real, inspiring and open. You and Kiwi have a long healthy happy and successful life ahead- greatness in every aspect.
LCCotter
you are so right! thank you friend. xxoo
Katie @ Talk Less, Say More
BREATHE! <-I remind myself to do that everyday! And my friends now know to remind me of that too when I'm freaking out "just breathe"
LCCotter
breathing now. <3
Brittany
Love love love this!! <3
Heather (Where's the Beach)
Need these tips right about now too. Thanks for sharing and I sure hope you know that you have a HUGE cheering squad for you and James both. Hugs friend.
Maureen
Hang on, because life is a long, bumpy journey. But the bumps are what make the smooth parts of the journey enjoyable! Love you! 🙂
Michele @ paleorunningmomma
Your list is such a great reminder! It’s been said a million times, but progress doesn’t come in a straight line, and when you’re in a setback or stall, it’s SO hard to remember that and have perspective. You are amazing at all that you do, and I admire you for staying strong when things get tough! You always have inspiring words when I’m feeling stalled, frustrated, whatever. Thanks for a great post 🙂
Pamela Hernandez
I love your list! I rest and write it out. Lists and putting “baby steps” in writing help me get moving forward again.
Jan
I know you’ll figure it out…lots of prayer, thought, patience…it will work out exactly as it’s meant to! Hugs to you & hubby as you work through this uncertainty.
LCCotter
thank you so much Jan!
Tara Newman
I want to acknowledge your wisdom by giving you an “Amen.” But I am also going to leave you with a question – How can I support you?
LCCotter
you do enough already! xxoo
Taylor @ LiftingRevolution
It’s crazy, we’re it in the same exact spot right now. I know it’s hard and we have those days where we wonder when we will get our “big break” (a lot this week actually). But yet, you take the time to let things settle to let the murkiness get to the bottom and clear the water so we can make new plans to continue on the crazy journey. love you!
LCCotter
i swear we live dual lives at time!
Laura @ Sprint 2 the Table
Oh man, I know this feeling so well. I’ve been there a few times in my career. Once I changed direction and went back to school (GREAT decision), and the other time I waited… and help did come! I got to desperate that I listened to a friend who advised that I simply put out into the universe what I wanted. I thought she was nuts at the time, but it totally worked!
Megan (The Lyons' Share)
I love this theory. I do think it feels nuts to do something like this at times, but it’s just admitting to yourself what you want / need, setting your intentions publicly, and asking for some help – which is a totally normal thing to do!
Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine
As long as week keep that “dream” in our minds, it won’t ever be gone or out of reach. We just have to keep moving and it will always be there even if we take some slow breaks from it!
emma @ be mom strong
You’re a super sherpa/wife! I can’t wait to see what live brings you two in the future, but I secretly hope you keep documenting it because I love reading!
Angela @ Eat Spin Run Repeat
I needed to read this today. I can identify in so, so many ways and 100% agree that you need to have people in your life to support you. That’s one thing I love about our lovely blog community – there’s always people to talk to who have had similar experiences. Great post, Lindsay! 🙂
Amanda - RunToThefinish
I think you hit it on the head, life ebbs and flows…sometimes smooth sailing and others we have to really get focused on a direction before we find ourselves a drift. damn that was a seriously good metaphor, I better go write something quick! 🙂
Skye
Some very good advice here, thank you Lindsay!
Tina Muir
Yep, I have been there, and it is SO hard not to force it to happen, but at the same time, so hard not to consider quitting. After I worked the hardest I ever have in my life for Philly marathon, and didnt get the result, and felt like death for months, I considered packing it all in. Steve told me exactly what you just said here “be patient”, I did, and it slowly came back together.
You are right on with your thinking here, but we all have to keep in mind that we are always moving towards those dreams, and those setbacks make the desire so much stronger, it means if you keep working, a breakthrough is coming, and you just have to let it rise to the surface for you to shine 🙂
Christine @ Love, Life, Surf
Seriously, I admire you both so much for your passion and patience and grace and commitment and drive. Being and feeling stalled is so hard but I just know that there are amazing things waiting to unveil themselves for both of you. xoxo
jill conyers
On a whim are some of my best posts.
I’m at the opposite end of stalling right now. Moving forward faster than I can keep up. Both sides can be overwhelming. When I’m overwhelmed I tend to freeze. Prevent feeling overwhelmed. Prevent negativity.
Erin @ The Almond Eater
I love it. For anyone who dreams I think it’s easy to feel stalled from time to time (and totally normal). Wishing you and Kiwi luck during this time–be patient and believe in your dreams and good things will come 🙂
SuzLyfe (@suzlyfe)
I think you have to remember that you simply cannot always have relentless forward movement, be it uphill or downhill. Even in training cycles, there are times that you must rest in order to finish that final surge towards the end. I like to think of it maybe as not stalling, but simply recovery. So refuel you soul and spirit so that you will be ready for the next round!
Misszippy
The Cotters are smart, patient, balanced people. I look forward to seeing the next chapter, whatever it may be!